An M&M’s real value is in its filling, not in its candy coating – the inside matters more than the outside. It is the same with hiring employees and voting for candidates.

You can’t tell by looking at someone if he will be a good or poor fit for a role. As with the M&M (the candy coating on the outside doesn’t add any particular value to taste or to the candy), a person’s age, gender, ethnicity, religion or even sexual preference has no direct correlation to his/her ability to be great in a job. An extraordinary customers service employee is one who is a great listener, empathetic, problem solver and solution-focused. An extraordinary political candidate must be visionary, strategic, a great listener and a consensus-builder. These attributes could be in a 65-year old woman, or in a 23-year old man. These attributes could be in a black employee, or a gay white middle-age Greek man. Greatness is not based on the exterior.

We can’t assess who is a good fit if we don’t hear meaningful dialog about what candidates (political and employment) believe and think. In the workplace we host interviews. We ask talent-based questions to determine how candidates would handle actual workplace situations to assess their thinking and fit – their “filling.” We then hire those who have the talents, passions and strengths to be successful, and celebrate their “candy coating” – whatever it may be. We hire the best. Great organizations hire for the “inside” and celebrate the “outside.”

I am reminded of this as I watch our electoral campaigning. Candidate debates and speeches are our way of “interviewing” candidates for “fit” – to assess their talents, passions and strengths and to see if they are the right for the role. When all we hear are attacks on other candidates we do not have the necessary information to choose wisely about a candidate and we allow our biases to limit our options – so many Americans still have a problem with a black president, gay cabinet members and women on the Supreme Court. We are in an age where the best person for the job is the one that has the talents, passions and strengths (the filling) to do the job – CEO, customer service, senator or judge. I see a constant focus on candy coating instead of filling in the workplace: I also see it in government.

As you hire employees or go to vote, focus on a candidate’s ability to do the job in an extraordinary way, make a difference and add value. You’ll find when you hire or vote for “fit” you’ll get a more passionate, engaged and productive employee or candidate. Things get done. Progress gets made.

One of the reasons I think we are stuck in “average” is we continue to use outdated thinking in both who works in our companies and who works in our government. Shouldn’t we demand performance greatness from both? Shouldn’t we require both to be fully accountable for results? Shouldn’t we improve this process by hiring for fit – by hiring for “filling,” not candy coating?

Maybe if we learn from the M&M, we’ll elect and hire those who show up committed to making a difference. Maybe if we realize it is what you know, what you are good at and how you use what you know to handle today on today’s terms that generates results, we’ll choose wisely about who we want on our team. Who knew there would be so much wisdom in an M&M?

“Prosperity-induced padding”– how interesting? Prosperity is the thing we work hard to achieve. “Padding” is the thing we work hard not to achieve. What does this tell us about how we use our prosperity? What does this tell us about our choices?

Prosperity brings us:
Time – many have enough resources not to need to work.
Talents – many have the ability to develop their personal greatness.
Treasure – many have great financial resources.

How do you use these to bring something more significant to the world? Consider using your prosperity to:
1. Reorganize and redesign your space to commit to recycling 100% of what can be recycled to tread more lightly on the planet.
2. Donate to and support a charity you find personally valuable and meaningful.
3. Buy healthy food for those who don’t have enough, or any – locally, nationally or internationally.
4. Sponsor a child’s education – locally, nationally or internationally.
5. Mentor a child, peer or someone older in what has helped you achieve your personal or professional prosperity.
6. Invent something new and valuable that advances the quality of life, the respect for the planet, improved health, or something else significant for humanity.
7. Educate about tolerance, acceptance and respect for differences.

Having access to so much doesn’t always make us better. Many times it makes us less healthy, less charitable and less concerned. “Prosperity-induced padding” is what I now call using my “extra” for me instead of for others. And I am committed to ending it – for health and for impact; I know I can’t be just aware of me.

So consider returning some of your prosperity back to your world. A little more time, talent and treasures shared with the world can help others improve their lives. Absolutely celebrate your success and prosperity. But then share this prosperity with others. Another way to say this is, be great, then share this greatness with the world.

Please share this with someone who can benefit from it. And The Greatness Zone is finally here. Starting Monday, October 11, 2010 you will be able to order it at the new and robust www.TheGreatnessZone.com, and at Amazon.com. Learn how to live in your greatness zone; it is the end of average…

I believe that we invent our lives – and our best lives are invented around our talents, strengths and passions. Though these attributes are part of who we are, they aren’t always initially obvious to us. They show up in the way we feel, what we notice, what matters to us and what moves us – and this requires time and good attention. We don’t notice these things about ourselves if we are moving at 100 miles an hour with our heads down and blinders on. We miss a lot of our world and our reactions to it. It is in these reactions that we get connected to who we really are. It is in these reactions that we know ourselves. And this is critical information we need to live a great life.

So what do you get if you lose the blinders and become more self-aware?

o You can better choose work environments that play to your talents and passions; this allows you to be more effective and more successful. Besides, you’ll like it more.
o You can choose better about life relationships and how you use your time; this allows you to be involved with people and events that move you, inspire you and engage you. Your performance again is better and you’ll enjoy it more.

Your life’s quality is based on your choices. And the more aware you are of your core talents, strengths and passions – your gifts – the more you can build your life around what makes you feel successful and happy. It is up to you to do this – others can’t do this work for you. It’s your life; you create your happiness.

So, lose the blinders. Start to notice everything. Because in each thing is information about you and how you respond. Get to know yourself to make decisions that help you live your best. Then bring that best to the world.

Please pass this on to someone who can benefit from it, and we are just one week away from the arrival of my latest book, The Greatness Zone – Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, Transform the World; to be available at www.TheGreatnessZone.com and at Amazon.com. Great information delivered in a great story.

Ken Blanchard of Raving Fans fame calls it +1; chef Emeril Lagasse calls it BAM! The point is they realize that achieving greatness in life is by playing to what you are good at and whenever possible, doing just a bit more – kicking it up – doing the stand out – committing to greatness.

In business, studies show that customers are more loyal when employees get things right and, whenever possible, do the extras – they do just a bit more.

Relationships soar when both sides do their best to add just a bit more to relationship, showing the other person how valuable and cared for he/she is.

At work, we improve our performance, achievement and impact when we do what is expected, then a just a bit more.

So, in what environments can you do just a bit more – how can you be a little more loving, forgiving, encouraging, supportive, disciplined, personal, caring, strategic, or innovative? How can you be a little more available, responsive, thinking, committed, kind, interested and flexible? You choose.

What you get when you do just a bit more?

o A look of love and appreciation from a spouse or partner.
o Applause from a colleague or friend.
o Greater achievement, performance and impact.
o A deeper relationship, purpose or significance.

I am motivated to always do “just a bit more” when I see the impact my writing and speaking can have on the lives of others. For you, it may be in how you make others feel, how you challenge your personal performance, or in visualizing the impact you intend to make in the world. The motivation is personal.
So, look at your life. Align yourself to things that play to your talents and passions – this helps you be good. Then, whenever possible, do just a bit more. This helps you move from good to great. And our world could definitely use more of us doing “just a bit more…”

Please pass this on to someone who will benefit from it, and watch for my new book, due out in 2 week – The Greatness Zone – Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, Transform the World. It is a tool to help you discover and live in your greatness zone. Sign up for all the events at www.TheGreatnessZone.com.

We all spend more time considering what we are not rather than what we are. We always compare ourselves to others – to who they are, what they have and what they think. Instead, we should check in on ourselves – to understand ourselves and use our voice, not the voices of others, to direct us in work and in life.

My work has me speaking to audiences and writing about discovering and playing to our talents, strengths and passions. I always find that we are all infinitely more capable and more connected than we initially believe, but don’t know this because we don’t invest the time to self-discover. When we are unfamiliar with how capable and competent we are, we allow others to direct us into areas that do not play to our greatness – we pass the wheel to another driver. And we end up on a road that is not always right for us. Life is too short to spend any time on the wrong road.

As I like to say, and is part of my personal belief, that someone larger than you thought you should be you, and equipped you with gifts that show up as your talents, strengths and passions. And when you play to these gifts, you see how capable you are.

I feel empowered with that news. That makes me want to discover my talents and build my life and work around them. This is how I connect to what I am naturally good at. This is how I feel capable and competent in a constantly changing world. This is how I invent my life in the way that makes the greatest sense for me. And inventing our lives is the greatest gift there is in life. And to do it well it requires that we “know ourselves.”

The first thing I always recommend for people starting to reconnect to who they are is to journal. Spend 10 minutes each day writing your thoughts.

Here are some good prompts to get you going:
o What am I doing when I am happiest?
o When I feel like I am making a great difference, I am doing…
o Two things that I love about my life are…
o What surprised me most about today was…

The goal of the journal is to help you start to notice you – how you think, what you believe, what you feel and what you notice. This is a great way to get introduced to your talents, strengths and passions. This will tell you a lot about you.

Journaling may be difficult to start, but once you start, you will look forward to the time each day to get connected to yourself, share your thoughts and be in the moment. The more you learn about yourself, the better decisions you will make about life and work. In the process, you will see how brave, strong and smart you really are. And this is something important you should know…

Please share this with someone who can benefit from it and watch for my new book, The Greatness Zone – Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, Transform the World, due out October 1. Sign up at www.TheGreatnessZone.com to hear of our events and resources, and friend us on Facebook at “The Greatness Zone.”

To keep your garden tools working effectively, you spend a morning changing oil in the lawn mower and cleaning debris off the rakes, shovels and other tools.

To keep the air conditioning system working effectively, you shut it down and clean the filters.

Nothing works all the time without maintenance, repairs and updating. This process improves the impact and extends the life.

What a great life lesson. What personal maintenance do you do to amplify your impact and extend your life?

Through the traditions of Lent, Yom Kippur and Ramadan, we are reminded of the need to recommit to self-inspection – to assess where we are, to recommit to where we need to be and to own the process of realignment – of doing periodic maintenance. Life is complicated. Without some regularly planned self-maintenance, we can get easily overwhelmed, off track and burned out.

To start your regular (monthly, quarterly, yearly) self-maintenance checklist, consider the following- modify as you want:

o Am I doing what I love and making the difference I want to make?
o Do I treat my family, friends and colleagues well, and am I aware of the gift that they are?
o Who needs me to be more open, more caring, more charitable or more generous?
o Do I eat well (healthy), and understand how to exercise for someone my age and in my current health status?
o Do I take medical issues seriously and promptly address changes in my body that need attention?
o What am I learning and how am I growing in knowledge and wisdom?

This is not a period to be critical where critical means fueling those negative voices that critique and blame what we do and how we do it. It is meant to be critical where critical means being self-aware and focused on realigning to be your best.

We all have busy lives that allow us to become easily distracted. At some regular point we must commit to reviewing and assessing how we are living our lives – we must take the time to do some maintenance. This can create the opportunity to stay on track, get back on track, improve your impact and extend your life.

Please pass this on to someone who can benefit from it, and watch for more information on my new book, The Greatness Zone – Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, Transform the World. Sign up to be notified when the book is released at www.TheGreatnessZone.com. And friend us on the Facebook Fan Page The Greatness Zone.

This is not a book review. Rather, a reminder that wisdom is all around us and that when we tune in, we learn things about ourselves, our lives and our world. The renewed interest in Eat, Pray, Love because of the movie has brought Elizabeth Gilbert and her thinking back into view. I recently saw her list of ten things to be happy and healthy; her perspective is that when these are taken care of, everything else seems to take care of itself.

First, I really like her list. Second, I like that she created a list. So even if some of these things do not encourage you to live healthy and happy, fill in with the things that do. This is a reminder that we invent our lives in the way we want them – we own how we approach our day to make the most of our lives. Develop your list of the ten things to be healthy and happy, and to love your life. (The comments in parentheses are mine – because I always have an opinion about everything.)

Here are her ten things:
1. Talk a walk (invite a friend to enhance the experience).
2. Write something (journal what you think and feel each day, you’ll be amazed what you learn about yourself).
3. Read something (there is too much to know not to stay connected to other people’s ideas).
4. Don’t eat too much (I think she learned this after her time in Italy).
5. Spend some time in silence (I like to spend this time outdoors).
6. Stretch (I like to think this is both body and mind – both atrophy without movement).
7. Send a message of love to someone (great idea – and why not send it to several people?).
8. Drink water (I like coffee better but she has a point).
9. Mess around in the garden (touch nature and be connected to the planet).
10. Floss (stay healthy and show up ready to face the world each day).

The number of things doesn’t matter. Develop your list so life is great. I didn’t present them because she has become a celebrity. I presented them because they are wise. I hope they inspire you to play to your greatness and have a life that is healthy and happy.

Please forward this to someone who can benefit from it and watch for my new book, The Greatness Zone – Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, Transform the World due out October 1. Sign up at www.TheGreatnessZone.com for more information about the book and learning how to find and live in your personal greatness zone.

There is a life lesson in this same phrase, “if you blend, you lose.” Your greatest happiness, impact and success will be in living your true life, not in following the crowd.

We are truly unique – different from everyone. This distinction is both external and internal. We look different, we think differently. Our brain biology predisposes us to be good at some things and not others. We love some things and not others. Our greatness is in the unique combination of talents, passions and strengths that came hardwired in our DNA when we were born. We were born to be unique – not to blend.

To take advantage of this greatness, we must take the time to know ourselves – to learn about what we are good at, passionate about and what matters to us.

Most of us have a loud “committee” – those internal voices that tell us to play it safe, blend, don’t stand out, do what everybody else does, be concerned with what others think and say. Then, we conform. We listen to voices that steer us away from our abilities, our dreams and our best contributions. When we don’t know ourselves well, we trust the perspectives of others more than our own – others’ voices become louder than ours. We follow the herd.

When we blend – when we act like everyone else even though we are different – we really do lose. We lose when we don’t play to our greatness – when we don’t develop our talents and strengths, and live our passions. We lose when we miss out on the things that move us, inspire us and engage us. And when we say no to these, we give away our greatest gift – the ability to invent our lives as we want them.

So, to develop the courage to stand out and be who you are,
1. Identify your talents.
2. Next, identify your passions.
3. Then, review your life to see how much of your talents and passions you include in the way you live and work.
4. Change things to live what matters to you. Turn down the volume of others’ voices.

My personal perspective is that when we realize our personal greatness, we bring our best to our world – we transform our world. So, if we blend we don’t live authentically, then we cheat the world. When we blend, we all lose.

As has been said, “We don’t get harmony when we all sing the same note.” We are supposed to find our own voice and sing our part. Discover your part and sing it in your way. What a concert it will be.

This perspective is presented in my new book, The Greatness Zone – Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, Transform the World. Join our mailing list at www.TheGreatnessZone.com to be notified when the book is available, and please pass this on to someone who can benefit from it.

I gently knocked on her window and asked if I could help. The window lowered. She was sobbing uncontrollably. Between sobs she told me she stopped to buy flowers for a sick friend. This friend was in the hospital and was all alone – she had no family in the area. She had been trying to get free for the last half hour, growing increasingly afraid that she would not be rescued and would miss the visiting hours in the hospital. She continued to cry. I took her hand and told her not to worry, that I would help her get on her way. She called me her hero – imagine.

To show her appreciation, she reached into her purse for a wallet and tried to give me some money. I refused but told her she had to do two things for me: first, once we start to get her car moving, she must keep going and not stop until she was back on clear roads. Second, that she had to be her friend’s hero. She promised to do both.

The way to get out of an ice rut is to rock the car back and forth. After four tries, and my pushing at the right moment, the car crested the rut and she was on her way. She waved through her open window and continued cautiously though the bumpy parking lot out onto a cleared street. I watched her drive away and never saw her again.

I think of this often, and other events like it. I didn’t plan on being someone’s hero – I know I just did what we were taught as kids – to always be there for others. Sometimes what seems to be the smallest thing can have an amazing impact on another’s life.

What have you done to be someone’s hero?

When called on to help, do you step up or step away?

Life requires us to be fully present. Sometimes we need help, sometimes we provide help. And in the process we realize we have a responsibility to and in this world. We invent our world in this very moment – and having a profound effect on someone else’s life – to be their hero – is one way we improve life for all of us.

Watch for my new book, The Greatness Zone – Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, Transform the World, due out October 1, 2010. Sign up to be notified when it is available and to be included in our Greatness events, activities and resources at www.TheGreatnessZone.com.

The same should be true for our lives. Who is your personal team of advisors – those friends, family members, colleagues or associates that you go to with your comments, ideas, challenges and successes? Who do you check in with for guidance and support?

Life is tough. And though I believe we are each hardwired for greatness, accessing our greatness sometimes requires help and wisdom from others. When we use this collective wisdom, we invent greater possibilities and opportunities; we can better sort through, discuss and decide.

Here are several situations that would benefit from your personal team of advisors:
1. You have received an unsolicited job offer from another company.
2. You have an idea for a business, book, event, etc., and wonder how it might be received.
3. You are dealing with the loss of a loved one, a broken heart, a lost job or other traumatic personal event.
4. You are deciding whether to buy a house, car, condo, or other large purchase.
5. You are challenged by something critical you heard in church, in your political party, in an association you belong to.

Who do you turn to? Whose opinions do you trust? Who is on your “personal team of advisors?”

Consider the following as a way to select your team of advisors:
1. Do I trust their decision-making process?
2. Do I value their expertise?
3. Do I know, understand and value their beliefs?
4. Do I feel connected to them as people?
5. Can I share something important, have it be kept in confidence and be fairly discussed?

Though life can be tough, we have the gift of others to help navigate the challenges that come with life. We must first know ourselves to be strong and confident on our own. Then, connect with several people who make up our team of life advisors, those who we can always turn to in order to sort things out, share a success or deal with a failure. None of us is as smart (or confident, or sane, or engaged) as all of us. Develop your “go to” team – your personal team of advisors.

Please forward this to someone who can benefit from it, and watch for my new book, The Greatness Zone – Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, Transform the World, due out in September.

After about 10 minutes of constant complaining, I interrupted and asked, “Has anything gone right?”

My colleague looked at me, embarrassed about the tsunami of negativity. We then spent the rest of dinner focused on the opportunities, successes and possibilities in our lives. It started as a meal destined for an antacid, but developed into an exceptionally uplifting and engaging evening. All it took was a change in outlook.

“So, what went right?” has become one of my favorite phrases. It gets me out of my cynical mindset or when a day or life becomes unpredictably difficult. I can choose to focus on the challenges and how unfair life can be, or I can realize that life is as it is – and that my success, happiness and attitude are based on how I choose to see and respond to life.

Consider the following ways to keep your week positive, upbeat and focused on what goes right:

1. When you start to feel yourself noticing only challenges and difficulties, stop, then list things that are going, or have gone, right. Don’t stop until you have 15 or 20 words, ideas or events. This is easier to do than you think.
2. Spend time getting to know yourself. When you know your talents and passions, you can put yourself into situations and roles that play to what you are good at and the things that appeal to you. This encourages you to feel capable, confident and interested. Playing to your strengths and passions helps you remain upbeat and optimistic.
3. Choose wisely who you deal with. Minimize your contact with negative people – and challenge them to focus more on what goes right than what goes wrong. Get a “no whining” and “no complaining” sticker for your car, office and fridge.

It is our choice to see only the negative, or to acknowledge the negative but focus on the positive. Dwelling on challenges and disappointments is unproductive. Assessing and responding with focus and optimism turns challenges into opportunities. So when things are tough, and you feel yourself starting to complain, ask yourself, what went right?

Please share this with someone who can benefit from it, and contact me to help you learn how to assess your talents and passions, to help feel more connected to work and life.

Life now moves at the speed of blur. Most days we fall into bed nearly unaware of all that happened in the day. Information moves through our heads so quickly that it rarely registers as it passes over our brains. So, slow it down for a minute. Get out a journal and write.

Here are some amazing things that happen when you start to spend some time with yourself and record your thoughts:

1. You start to notice details you previously did not notice; you improve your vision and awareness.
2. You start to see how you behave, what you think and what you feel with greater clarity – you start to better understand yourself.
3. You become more connected to your world, your relationships and your sense of self.

Journaling is a great reminder that you own your life and your responses. Journaling helps you to sort through feelings, emotions, ideas and perspectives. Journaling asks you to talk to yourself, to see what you really believe, what you really want, and what you really feel. This is what makes journaling difficult for many people. But the benefits – the awareness it creates – is priceless – in both work and life situations.

To get started journaling, I recommend the following:

1. Buy a lined notebook. I like handwriting instead of using a computer, but do what makes you feel more comfortable.
2. Commit a time each day to journal. Spend 10 minutes in that time period and write whatever comes to mind. The first week is difficult. But once you get your groove, you will look forward to journaling.
3. Start by recording a statement, then journal what you think about it. Examples:
a. I am most happy when I am …..
b. Something that I thought would be difficult, was easy…
c. Two great people I met today were…
d. I feel my most capable when I am doing…
4. Allow yourself to write whatever comes to mind. Don’t edit.
5. Once you get in the habit, spend time reviewing what you write. What information does it tell you about you – your talents, strengths and passions?

Get reconnected to the greatness that is in you. Start by writing down what you think and feel. Start to tell your story. Journaling… it does a body good…

Watch for my new book, The Greatness Zone – Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, and Transform the World, due out this September.

Here is my perspective. Each of us has specific talents and strengths – attributes uniquely hardwired in us. Some are great with details and solving challenges, others are exceptional listeners, relationship builders or have spiritual insight. Some are artistic and some can write. Some can invent and some are extraordinary teachers. Each of us has the ability to create our personal masterpiece – our great work.

When we discover and play to our talents and strengths, we bring our best to our lives and to our world – we access our greatness and use it to impact the world.

o A teacher’s great work can change the life of a student forever.
o An artist’s great work can change a person’s mood with their art, music or writing.
o A builder’s great work can create a safe place for a family to realize their dreams.

The point is you have a masterpiece in you – there is greatness in you. But most people are unfamiliar with how to find and release their masterpiece. It starts by knowing yourself – the talents, strengths and passions you have. Here’s how:

1. List what you are great at. What comes naturally? What do others say you are great at? What do you seem to have great success doing?
2. List what you are passionate about. What gets you excited, energized and fired up? What could you do all day and never look at the clock?
3. Review your lists. Where do they intersect? What are you good at and love doing? These are your masterpiece areas. These are your areas of greatest performance, greatest impact and most significant contribution. What things come to mind? Where are you at your best?

The more connected and self-aware you are, the clearer your masterpiece areas will become. The world needs you as you are. Don’t try to force it or to be what others insist you be; instead, play to the talents, strengths and passions you that are part of the deeper or “true you.” When you understand yourself, you will see your masterpiece emerge.

I’ll talk more about this in my new book, The Greatness Zone; Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, and Transform the World, due out in September 2010. Watch for more information soon.

For me, making it an “event” is not about elaborate trips or expensive dinners. Rather, life becomes an “event” when you pay attention to the little details that show those in your life you care, love and value them. The greatest value in any relationship is not found in the things you have to do, but in the extras you choose to do.

There are so many places during the day to move from ordinary to extraordinary – to do the little things that make life a constant celebration.

Life is an “event” when:
* You get a note in your lunch in addition to your favorite sandwich.
* Your favorite cookies or crackers never seem to run out.
* You thought you needed gas in the car but it has been filled up.
* Candles are lit at mealtime, even at lunch.
* A book by your favorite author shows up on your nightstand.
* You forget and ask the same question 3 times, but you get the same gentle response.
* A card is left on your computer or in your briefcase – just because.
* Regular wine become sangria and dinner becomes a festival.
* A look, a smile or a wink means “it is you, it has always been you, it will always be you.”

A life that is extraordinary gets the big things right and constantly celebrates the important little things. Details matter. Feelings matter.

So, how do you make your life, and the lives of those you care about, an “event”? Don’t wait – you don’t get these days back. Do the little things. Do a lot of them. Do them often.

Please forward this to someone who can benefit from it and be sure to sign up for my newsletters on at www.LiveFiredUp.com.

Life is as life is. The most successful people in life (and I define successful people in life as those who love their lives, not just those that have the most stuff) are those who find small ways to stay upbeat, happy and engaged regardless what comes their way. They reconnect to small meaningful things during the day to remind themselves of what is going right instead of what is going wrong. They make the time for attitude mini-makeovers – minor changes in attitude and approach to focus on abundance and possibility, not scarcity and impossibility.

Here are two examples:

1. When you notice your belt is getting a little tighter than it should, eliminate snacks for the week, or replace them with fruit. Don’t change all your eating habits, just select one thing and either eliminate an abuse or add something of value. It helps you feel in charge, it is easier to do and it helps you address an issue. You feel empowered and capable. It does great things for your attitude.

2. When you see that times are tight and you have less money for the old traditions of eating out, going to movies or buying things at will, you modify just a bit to have friends over, play board games, go for coffee instead of meals, or plan a day of window shopping instead of store shopping. Life is still fun, but now it doesn’t put you into a financial situation you can’t afford. You feel empowered and capable. It does great things for your attitude.

Human nature seems to drive us to notice what is not right, then spend our time complaining about it and making it larger than it is. True, life does send us true traumas. So, to me, when it is not a true trauma, don’t make it one. See things as they are, realizing that life is as it is; our job is to find ways to be happy and successful with whatever comes our way. And to quote from Winnie the Pooh (it is amazing where wisdom can come from), “You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” Just handle things a little at a time.

So, let’s try something. This will be the only time I’ll let you blame.

Complete this phrase in as many ways as you want:
“If it weren’t for__________________, I could (would) be doing _______________.

Got your list?

Here are some I have heard lately:
If it weren’t for this recession, I’d have a better job (or a job).

If it weren’t for my work schedule, I’d eat better and be healthier.

If it weren’t for the kids’ activities schedule, the house would be cleaner.

If it weren’t for my boss’s mental instability, I would have been promoted already.

If it weren’t for wife’s (husband’s) family, I would enjoy the holidays.

I find blaming wears me out. After blaming, nothing happens. Nothing changes. Now I am tired and not any better.

Here is what I offer. If each of your “If it weren’t for ______” statements are truly important to you, then it is critical for you to own the result. So, if you said, “If it weren’t for my work schedule, I’d eat better and be healthier,” how will you own this result instead of blame the work schedule? Can you prepare food to take with you, have family members help you cook, investigate new quick and easy, healthy foods and recipes, redefine your work hours to build in exercise, yoga or meditation time, find others with similar schedules and see how they make it work? It is about taking ownership of what you need to happen. No excuses.

So to me, the choices are: get worn out by blaming others and having no resolution, or, own the outcome and make changes in our behaviors to get the desired result.

This week, pick one of your “If it weren’t for ______” statements, and own its outcome. Just do one. Then next week, do another, and another. Soon you’ll see that when you own the results, things happen. And try this with your kids and your teammates in the workplace. Create a “blame-free” zone.

Please forward this to someone who can benefit from it.

Let me share two stories of those who made the effort to know themselves, then based on what they discovered about themselves, chose to kick it up and respond in an extraordinary way (for them). It took (takes) effort and courage.

Sam is the son of a friend of mine. He has always wanted to be an actor. His passion is to act. He was in all the plays in high school and is even working on his first screenplay. It is all he can think of. He earned and saved enough money and moved to Los Angeles to be closer to the movie industry. And like all aspiring actors, is working several odd jobs to afford putting himself into the environment that activates his greatest passions. His mom worries about him but she also realizes that he is living an extraordinary life – for him. He isn’t worried about buying a house, having a fancy car. He puts himself into areas that get him noticed for his acting and his writing. He couldn’t be happier – his life is kicked up – and is extraordinary – for him. He knows himself. He knows what makes life great for him and he goes for it.

I have another good friend whose youngest son recently came out. Though she had suspected he was gay for years, it is now out in the open. She told me her greatest sadness about him coming out was that he was not going to have a normal life – a normal life according to her terms. But after hours of conversation with each other, she now realizes that his life is very happy – for him. Getting married to comply with family expectations would have given him someone else’s life. He is now living openly and honestly and is creating his own extraordinary life – as an exceptional attorney. She can now see that extraordinary had to be his definition, not hers. And to know what that is, he had to know himself and be honest with himself.

So, how well do you know yourself? What makes life ordinary and what makes life extraordinary – for you?

You choose how you want life to be and since you do not get this day back, shouldn’t it be an extraordinary, “kicked-up” kind of day? That is my goal each day.

What would make today EXTRAordinary for you? And how will you make it happen?

Please forward this to someone who can benefit from it and contact me to help you learn how to better know yourself, so you can choose EXTRAordinary for you.

o Apply for jobs that play to your talents and passions. Take a talent assessment to start to learn about your talents and intrinsic strengths.
o Use a talent-based resume, not a skill and experience-based resume; this shows your fit – something that is very important for hiring managers.
o Learn how to be great in a talent-based interview. These are different than the old style interviews because they require you to think on your feet.

Go to www.LiveFiredUp.com and click on ‘Job Seeker’ for information about these – Standard Job – Old Job.

Now, on to something new.

If you realize that a standard job is not for you (you can’t get one or don’t want one), then consider the flexible free agent role. This is a role you create that strings together several part-time roles or tasks into a full-time job, focusing on your talents and passions.

To start the process of flexible free agent, you need the following information about you and your world:
1. What are you great at and passionate about doing?
2. Of what you are great at, who needs what you do?
3. How will you get in touch with who needs you and start your flexible free agent role?

Let’s first see a couple of examples:

#1: Your talents: Detailed-focused, organized, efficient and productive.
Your passion: organization, implementation, driving and achieving results.
Opportunities: Work with companies that need:
*External/Internal events planned.
*Coordinate company event or initiative (new policy, new process, new education).
*Office administration, task organization, special project management, staffing coordination.

#2: Your talents: great communicator, listener and relater
Your passion: connecting with others, hearing others stories and experiences
Opportunities: Work with companies that need:
*Information about customer service, employee perspectives, or consumer perspectives – create and manage a survey process to gather information.
*Local radio, TV channel, newspaper opinion sourcing role that want stories about people and their lives.
*Develop and coordinate a social networking (cloud) for small organizations that deal in a product or service that matches your passions.

The starting point is knowing what you do well, then assessing who in your world could use what you do. Then invent the possibilities and your new customized role – Non-Standard Job – New Job.

For more information go to www.LiveFiredUp.com and click on the “Reinvent Your Work Self” link under ‘Job Seeker.’

In the living well magazine of my local supermarket was an article about a twelve-year old who worked with her family to limit their trash output to one bag a week. She educated her entire family about what can be recycled, required reusable containers and bags, and insisted on a commitment to reduce the amount of “stuff” the family has. Tread lightly on the planet.

An author friend of mine blogged this week about an elderly man who had fallen on the street, and though a crowd gather around him, no one bothered to help him stand. My friend came through the crowd and helped the man stand, made sure he was fine, then moved along on his way. Don’t tread lightly when it comes to helping others.

My neighbors in Florida funnel the rainwater from their roof into cisterns and barrels, and use this water to irrigate their plants and gardens. They comply with the water restrictions and are careful about how much water they use and when they use it. They respect this resource. Tread lightly with our natural resources.

I was in a Starbucks last week and watched a kid, excited about ordering his own beverage (the parent was in the car), realize to his horror that he did not have enough money with him. The person in line covered his shortfall and the kid’s smile returned in an exceptional way. Don’t tread lightly with kindness.

It is our choice to respond – to tread lightly when it comes to our planet, our resources and our world – and to not tread lightly when it comes to kindness, generosity, help and support.

– What three ways will you tread lightly on the planet – and how will you share your ideas with others to do the same?
– What three ways will you not tread lightly (be bold) in your service and kindness to others – and how will you share your ideas with others to do the same?

Each of us makes an impact – is it the right impact? Do more of some things; do less of others. Own your impact and share what you know.

Please pass this on to someone who can benefit from it and contact me for help or inspiration.

The greatest innovation in our economy comes from small businesses or individuals who bring their ideas for greatness to the world. In today’s “hard to get a job” workplace, why not look at what you are great at, innovate and reinvent your work self? Why not focus more on your ideas, talents and passions than on existing jobs – and invent a new and better role for yourself?

Challenge your thinking that a job is in one place, is for one employer, has a fixed work week, and has a specific title. Does that make you uncomfortable? Of course – all change does.But as things change, holding on to the past doesn’t help you become successful today.

How to reinvent your work self:
1. Identify what are you good at and what value can you bring to others?
2. Identify what do you love to do and what value can this add for others?
3. How much do you need/want to make each day, week, month?
4. What opportunities do you see that could give you the earnings and allow you to play to what you are good at and passionate about – how can you reinvent your work self?
5. What do you need to investigate to determine how to do it professionally?

My starting recommendation for people working through this transition is to take a talent assessment (you can find mine on this site) and to read the book, Start With Why by Simon Sinek (this week’s featured resource). Knowing your “why” – your purpose – will guide you on this process of self-reinvention.

Additionally, I am starting a new section on my website Reinvent Your (Work) Self, including stringing together many part-time roles into one new one, trying something new, and inventing a new (high-value) role for yourself.

Check back regularly as I develop this with help from many employment experts on www.LiveFiredUp.com and click on “Job Seeker.” Maybe your current difficulty in getting hired will be the incentive for you to reinvent yourself in a bigger and happier way. Know yourself, know your “why” and have the courage to reinvent yourself.

Please share this with someone who can benefit from it and contact me to help you learn how to reinvent your (work) self.

Studies support a direct connection between overall wellness and those who are upbeat, positive, appreciative, and are treated in a positive way – honey. These same studies support the negative impact on health, attitude and performance in those who are continually angry, caustic, unhappy or are treated in a negative way – vinegar.

In The Balance Within, author Dr. Esther Sternberg presents the science that connects health and emotions – that our outlook, attitude, self-talk and mental images can impact our sense of wellbeing, and the wellbeing and success of others. We can actually impact our health and performance by how we talk to ourselves and what we hear from others.

Studies in the classroom have shown a direct correlation between positive teacher expectation and student achievement. The more optimistic and supporting the teacher, the stronger the self-image students had. The stronger this self-image, the better the students performed. Their mental images were influenced by the positive expectations of the teachers.

Encouraging and supportive parents empower children to see the world in a more positive way. The children feel more capable, are happier and are more successful.

Positive and supportive managers activate the best from their people by crafting a compelling vision and by believing in the greatness of their people. They focus on purpose, success, build employee self-confidence and create a positive and supportive environment. Performance improves.

As is presented in Appreciative Inquiry: An Emerging Direction for Organization Development by David Cooperrider, “Scholars are recognizing that the power of positive imagery is not just some popular illusion or wish but an expression of the mind’s capacity for shaping reality.” When you think positively, you create a more positive reality. Honey is better than vinegar. Results prove it.

To add more honey to your life, consider the following:
1. Listen to your external talk and self-talk. Eliminate the negative and critical language. Instead of saying “I’ll probably screw this up,” say, “I will find a way to be great at this.” Use positive talk with others.
2. Develop a compelling positive personal vision for home, work and life. It is your life, what great things do you want? See it, believe it, live it.
3. Find the positive in others and comment on it. Work on seeing the greatness around you.

Science supports what our grandparents knew – you get more with honey than with vinegar. People are drawn to positivity – they respond by becoming more positive. This can create a new more positive reality. It is definitely time to start a “honey revolution.” Are you in?

Please forward this to someone who will benefit from it, and contact me to help you start your “honey revolution.”

Here is a quote from a colleague of mine, Ira Wolfe, from his powerful article ‘What Jobs Won’t Return.’ “Employees in new jobs don’t “go to work” … and if they do, they don’t work in permanent full-time positions. They work in part-time jobs, often working for several employers at the same time. But unlike the past when working part-time was a stepping stone to full-time employment or a means to propping up personal finances, part-time work in the future will be by design. Skilled workers will work remotely, simultaneously interacting with different teams in different places and even collaborating on different projects. People with the right skill sets can do that. The contingent worker, or “just-in-time” worker, will become the norm, especially in lower skill jobs. The less versatile the employee, the more expendable he or she becomes.” See his full article.

So, if we are talking about job hunting, maybe we need to expand our definition of what a job is. So consider:

1. Identifying what your best talents and skills are – what are you consistently great at?
2. Identify several environments that can use these skills or talents on a part-time basis.
3. Develop a new work approach by stringing several temporary roles together, or build a list of companies you work for when they need your skills and talents.

This can give you flexibility in work your schedule, the ability to constantly do what you do best (instead of working in a job that uses only some of your skills) and the ability to choose who you work for. This is the first step in reinventing the future of work.

The world has changed. Maybe you should be reinventing how you work instead of looking for a job that may no longer exist. Don’t get stuck in an outdated model of job hunting or work – invent what works best for you. Play to your strengths and find those who need what you are great at.

Please pass this on to someone who can benefit from it and contact me to help you reinvent what work may be for you.

I was at a great bakery this week – artisan bread and pastries that are incredible. Yum. I asked about one pastry I did not recognize. The woman behind the counter took it off the plate, cut it into pieces and offered one to me and to the others in line, then told us the process of how it is made. Extraordinary.

I was talking to colleague whose child has an amazing teacher. As they study geography, this teacher brings in authentic food, plays the country’s music and introduces some of the language. The kids are captivated and interested. They learn. Extraordinary.

I traveled this week. And hidden in my briefcase was an amazing card, reminding me how loved I am at home, and how missed I am when I travel. Extraordinary.

Notice that I did not bring up the ordinary events – I don’t remember them. They are bland, boring and leave no impression. If you want to get noticed in the workplace, do some “extraordinary.” If you want to build a more powerful relationship at home, do some “extraordinary.”

Doing the extraordinary is rarely about spending. Rather it is about doing something with greater effort, creativity, interest or passion. It is about the extra effort. It is about adding some WOW! It is about being more present, more engaged and more fired up. It is a reminder that extraordinary is so much better than ordinary.

So what ways can you move from ordinary to extraordinary this week? What ways can you kick it up at work and at home?

So remember, if you have the choice to make it ordinary or extraordinary, why choose ordinary?

Please forward this to someone who can benefit from it and contact me to help you learn how to connect to your “extraordinary.”

Here is why I mention this. I wrote the book to offer a process to help you know yourself, find your fit and transform your world. Another way to say that is to help you see the difference you make. It is presented as a story of two kids in college – and how they learn the five rules for a really great life. It presents this thinking:

Each of us has the ability and responsibility to invent our life. We are given amazing gifts – known as our talents and passions. We are all different; your gifts and mine are not the same. The reason for this is shared in the great quote, “we don’t get harmony when we all sing the same note.” We are all different to add to and invent an extraordinary world. When we know our talents and passions, we can bring our best to the world. But if you don’t know what you are great at and love to do, how will you share your best? Or, how will you make a difference?

So as I get the book ready to share this new approach, I ask you to start to consider what difference you make each day:
o Whose world is better because you are part of it today?
o What is one great thing you do that changes your life or someone else’s life for the better?
o What can you share today that will make someone happier?
o What can you share today that will make someone better?
o What did you learn about yourself today that reminds you of what a difference you make?
o What passions do you have that help us understand our world and connect better with others?
o What does the world need that you do well?

To make your greatest difference you must first know yourself. From your gifts, you can find where you have the greatest impact and what you can bring to the world. This is meant to be practical. Be yourself. Be great.

What difference can you make today?

Please share this with someone who can benefit from it and contact me to learn more about the five rules for a really great life.

This week, I ask you to join me in using the phrase have I told you how much I appreciate you? with the people in your life. A simple phrase that reminds us to value, honor and acknowledge the greatness we see in others.

Say “Have I told you how much I appreciate you…” with the following (or, add your own) – and use it with as many people as you can:
o For the way your smile can remind me I have everything I need – in you.

o For the things of beauty you add to my day.

o For your humor, love, sincerity and honesty.

o For making the best food on the planet.

o For watching out for me when I get too busy to do it for myself.

o For letting me screw up and not rubbing my nose in it, and forgiving me for it.

o For giving me a hug when it was exactly what I needed.
o For greeting me every morning with “Happy Anniversary” because every day is an anniversary of choosing to be together.
o For making an “event” out of the little things to make them great things.

o For saying ‘no’ to something you want so I can say ‘yes’ to something I want, and never bringing it up.

o For always doing your best – at everything.

o For choosing me to go through life with you.

Appreciation is the glue that keeps people together. Never miss an opportunity to notice each other’s greatness and appreciate it.

Make today the first day of your year of appreciative living. Then next year, on this date (your appreciative anniversary), commit to another year…and another. Soon, appreciative living will be your standard. And it all starts with “Have I told you how much I appreciate you for….?”

Please forward this to someone who can benefit from it and contact me for help in learning the art of appreciation.

We create our best lives and work when we build them around what we are good at and love to do; when we build them around our “thing.”

You do your best work when you feel capable and competent. You are more creative, more interested and more focused; you are in your element. You feel confident; you reach for more; you do more – and better. You are at your best when you play to what you are good at.

Now imagine yourself working in an area where you do not feel capable and competent. You second-guess your decisions. You don’t feel very creative nor are ready to take risks for greatness. You feel unsure. You just play it safe. You watch and don’t participate.

What a waste.

Live is too great and too much of a gift to allow it to go by without playing to our talents and passions – our unique gifts. I believe it is part of the plan that we invent our lives around the unique gifts we received in our DNA – our hardwiring. The more we know ourselves, the more we can identify these gifts and include them in our lives. This way we play to our “thing” – and the quality of both work and life is better.

What are you great at? Not sure? Try this:
1. List what you feel you are good at.
2. Ask three others who know you well what they feel you are good at. Compare their comments to yours.
3. Start to see a profile of your talents and strengths – your “thing.” Identify how you can include these in both your work and life.

We are not good at everything. But we are exceptional at some things.

We each are given a very particular set of talents, strengths and passions – many call these our “gifts.” It is our responsibility to know them and to build them into as many aspects of life as we can – because they are our best areas. We are good at them. We love doing them. We make a difference with them. And I believe we each have a different great “thing” so we have the ability to bring something particular and extraordinary to our world. There is space for all of us to have our “thing.”

Please forward this to someone who may benefit from it. Please contact me if you need more information to help you find “your thing.”

Let me tell you about two of my friends.

Sam (name has been changed) is clear about what he thinks and believes about himself; he knows what he is good at, passionate about and what success is for him. He has found his personal fit in today’s world based on his talents, passions and purpose. And though he listens to the world, he never allows it to determine how he should live, what work he should do and how he spends his money. He is one of the most content people I know.

Jean (name has been changed) is very aware of popular opinion. She chooses what she wears, where she works and what she drives based on what others say. She does not trust her understanding of herself, has not spent the time to know herself, or made decisions that matter for her. She is one of the most erratic and discontented people I know.

In a world where technology constantly exposes us to popular opinion, I look at these two (and many more just like them), to see the impact of using our perspective or another’s perspective of how to live. In all cases, those who take ownership of what is personally important are more content.

Much of my work helps people rediscover their passion for work and life by finding their fit – finding their best place. Those who find their fit know the following things about themselves:
1. What they are good at – what makes them feel capable and competent.
2. What they love to do – what activates their passions and emotions.
3. What is success for them in today’s world – what makes them happy and where value is for them in today’s terms.

So what do you know about you? Moreover, who do you listen to? Is your voice louder and more confident than public opinion? How will you ensure you are living the life you choose, instead of one that others say you should? (Be sure to read George Saunders’ essay “The Braindead Megaphone.) Own it. Work strong, live stronger.

Please pass this on to someone who can benefit from it. Contact me if you need my help.

You need the hiring manager to be skilled at hosting a great interview so you can share what you need to about your performance and capabilities, learn enough about the organization to help you make a good choice about the job, and show you are a good fit for the role. This creates a problem for many of today’s job seekers – a problem you need to take control of.

Consider the following to ensure the interview is an effective use of time for both of you – to show what you are capable of, create a strong impression of yourself, and learn enough about the organization to know if you fit:

1. Be confident in your spoken and body language. Speak clearly and confidently. Sit up straight. Walk confidently. Shake hands firmly while making eye contact. Create the image you want them to remember.
2. Notice your environment. Relate something you see in the interviewer’s office, space or building that creates a personal connection or directs you to sharing something important about your performance. Notice awards, portraits, photos, products, etc. and find a connection.
3. Share two important things you learned in researching the company. Say something about the company that shows you have done your work ahead, and that will also move the interview to discuss something important about your performance. For example, “I see you have recently expanded into France. The international customers I worked with in my last two roles had significantly different expectations than Americans. Can I tell you what I did that was successful?”
4. Identify three critical things about your performance the hiring manager needs to know and prepare a way to ensure they are discussed. If the hiring manager does not ask about something you feel to be important, you could say, “I believe that…” and then share a performance perspective. Or, you can say, “I have a question about the way you…” and relate it to how you have handled a similar situation. You now direct the discussion to something important about your performance.

I have been through many interviews over my career where the hiring manager wasted both my time and his/hers. I make it my responsibility to use the interview time effectively and to ensure the hiring manager knows critical performance information about me. Be ready to take control of the interview if you need to.

For sample talent-based interview questions and my list of the hot industries and hot jobs, go to www.LiveFiredUp.com and click on “Job Seeker.”

Please share this with someone who can benefit from it. Contact me if you need my help.

Suzan Colon shares in her great book, Cherries in Winter, the stories of how her family has weathered tough times, and how these responses are meaningful in helping us stay focused, healthy and confident in our period of uncertainty and change. Her grandmother used the phrase, “broke, but not poor.” Broke meaning times are tough now – but this is temporary. Poor refers to something more permanent. It was her way of saying “we’ll do what it takes to get by, then we’ll get better.” Realistic and optimistic. Wisdom for real life.

Tough times remind us that all things come and go, increase and diminish. So in the down times, what are your traditions or techniques to raise your spirits and keep you sane, healthy and appreciating life? What stories and wisdom do your older relatives share about how to weather tough times and retain your appreciation for what you have and who you are?

Here are tips from seniors who have learned how to be “broke, but not poor:”
1. Spend just a little on a treat every now and then. Make it a celebration.

2. Share what you have. It connects you at a deeper level and helps remind others to do the same.

3. Redefine value as experiences instead of things. Make a point of socializing more with friends and family. Share stories.

4. Say thank you more. It helps you see what you have instead of what you don’t have.

5. Get up and get moving each day. Start each day with a clear purpose and a personal sense of value.

History does seem to repeat itself. Some of its greatest lessons are still meaningful for us today. Many of our older relatives have weathered storms significantly more difficult than today’s. Their wisdom is timeless and guidance is priceless. Most times we don’t need to reinvent things – we just need to check in with those who have had experience with handling life on life’s terms.

Please pass this on to someone who can benefit from it.

So how do you talk about yourself and not sound vain or arrogant? Try these:

1. Introduce yourself and a little of what makes you human; share a story about your family, your friends or an event that gives a realistic and positive image of you. People learn more from and are more engaged in stories.

2. Talk about your value. Don’t just introduce things you have done; introduce things that show what you have done and the value it provided. Start with “Let me tell you about a time when…” Or, “can I tell you about a time that I was able to ….?”

3. Show your confidence. Ask about situations you will encounter in the workplace and offer to respond to them. This shows your thinking, approach, energy and fit.

4. Be warm, human, friendly and interested. In short, be present in the interview. One of the most significant reasons candidates fail in their interviews is their minds are elsewhere when on the interview. Apply for a meaningful job, then be fully present to show your talents, fit and value. Turn off your cell phone.

Say what you need to say about you and your fit for the role. Be ready to bring up important situations to show your value and approach, even if the interviewer does not. They want to see your aptitude, personality and confidence. You have what they need to know that can help you get the job. This is one moment where it is all about you. Share your information the right way.

Please share this with someone who can benefit from it.

Feeling the tension and anger? I thought so.

Two questions:
The first: What can’t you control?
o The weather.
o Your favorite cousins have the flu and won’t be attending.
o Using the new fire pit under the flowering pear tree that is in full flower.
o Aunt Melinda’s jello salad; Uncle Jim’s jokes.

The second: What can you control?
o How you cook the food today.
o How you rearrange the house or garage to have the party.
o How you move the activities to indoor events.
o How much fun you will still have, and how great it will be to see the family.
o Your outlook and attitude.

One of my favorite quotes comes from the poet Maya Angelou, “I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage and tangled Christmas tree lights.”

So, if this were your party, what would the rain tell you about you? Do events that you cannot control take control of you? Do you have a meltdown, or do you realize it is beyond your control and find reasons to be happy?

I often tell the story of getting detoured from my normal route to the highway only to find an amazing plant nursery I did not know about; great plants, great prices and a farmer’s market. What a find! I had two choices with the detour – allow it to get me upset, or to realize I had no control over the event and to be on the lookout for something great.

I believe there is always something great, often initially hidden by a disappointment. The trick is to learn how to be able to see it. And you can’t if you let the things you cannot control get you down.

You can’t always control how things happen, but you can always control how you respond. Be optimistic, upbeat and look for the good. “Positive attitude” – it does a body good.

Please pass this on to someone who can benefit from it.

The last two years have been some of the toughest times in many of our lives. But tough times are just part of the way life is. Life is as it is – our role is to respond to it, treasure and live it in an extraordinary way, regardless how it comes at us.

The key to this is to know yourself – what makes you happy and what your favorite things are. Then to build these things into your life, particularly in tough times, to feel optimistic, content and well.

Most of us don’t spend enough time knowing ourselves and in particular, the things that make us happy. When tough times arrive, we are ill-equipped to successfully respond. So start today. Create a list of your favorite things. Build as many of them into your life everyday – and double up on them when your world is difficult.

Ask yourself these questions to create your list of “favorite things:”
1. What am I good at? What do I feel capable and competent doing?
2. What am I passionate about? What gets me engaged and fired up?
3. What could I do all day and never look at the time?
4. What can I read that will bring me to a good place?
5. Who can I spend time with and feel connected, important and loved?
6. What place or location makes me feel connected and alive?

So back to a thunderstorm in Salzburg, Austria and the Von Trapps. The lesson is that when things get tough, know how to respond with things that make you feel happy, secure and loved. Build your list. Have it ready because life is never easy, but how you respond can make it great.

If this technology has the ability of connecting you to so many others, why not use the technology to get yourself known. Create a “get hired” Facebook site.

Set up your “get hired” page to have the following:
o Your core talents, interests, strengths and passions as part of your bio. Click here to access my talent assessment.
o Pictures of you in the workplace, in the community and copies of letters of recommendation and commendations.
o Scan the talent-based resume as an image and add it to your albums.
o Create an album for each role you are looking for such as retail, healthcare, law enforcement, regulation or some other focus. Create a specific photo album that profiles you, your resume, your attributes, your interests, and your impact.
o Identify companies you wish to work for. Join their fan pages. Become friends with their employees and management.
o Join other fan clubs related to job seeking, talent, performance or related to the industries or jobs you are seeking. Know the industries’ associations and annual meetings.
o Maintain the integrity of your job-seeking site to ensure you are perceived as professional and a good fit for the job. Disable the ability of others to tag you in pictures. This puts your reputation in your control.
o Share this address with your serious job prospects and colleagues who can share your information with their networks.

Remember: This is NOT your social site. This site’s only focus is to present your employability, fit and value to the workplace.

So, now how do you use Facebook – to show embarrassing pictures or to create new contacts to get hired?

Now let’s say that as you are detoured, you pass by an amazing coffee shop and bakery – you never knew they were there. And next to them is an orchard with fresh fruit and homemade wine. How serendipitous.

Now, back to life. You are moving through your busy life. Suddenly an event happens – a recession, a lost job, an illness, a family emergency. A roadblock. You can’t move on as you were. You have to stop. You have to find a detour. What is your first reaction? Wait, let’s talk about this…

Obstacles and roadblocks are life’s way of saying “stop, think, dig deeper into yourself, see what you are made of, then respond.” Roadblocks are life’s way of getting our attention – then offering us a detour.

Most people hate the roadblock; it is perceived as a negative event and an interruption. Instead, consider the roadblock as an event for good – to help you see how capable you are, to get you out of “autopilot,” and to show you things you were too distracted to see – like the bakery and the orchard on the detour.

As you meet your roadblocks:
1. Believe that something better is in store.
2. Allow yourself to stop, think and respond, noticing your capabilities and strengths. As has been said, “we fear because we forget (or don’t know) how strong we are (or who we are).”
3. Connect with others to collaborate in ways to react and respond; think “collective genius.”

A roadblock is forced change. Most people hate change. Instead, be open to the good change can bring and learn to welcome it. Soon, roadblocks will become great events because they’ll show how capable you are and how big your world can be; they can change your perspective.

Talent-based interviews use talent-based or behavior-based questions. These are great for a couple of reasons:
1. Talent-based questions assess how you think by asking how you would handle real workplace situations. They want to see how you would handle situations that will be part of the job; better to know this up front.
2. Talent-based questions can’t be pre-planned or practiced – you just have to respond. This gives your best and most honest answer, which is the best way to assess your fit for the job.

The now outdated standard interview questions allow you preparation time – and that means the hiring manager won’t know how you will really react in the workplace. Your “on your feet” response is more accurate about how you will act in the workplace. This is critical.

Here are a couple of examples of talent-based questions. See how these questions are designed to get you to think on the spot:
1. If I were to ask your previous boss or co-worker how you handle change in the workplace, what would he say. Give me an example.
2. What was your latest and greatest idea in your last job? How did you present it? How was it received?
3. What does a customer mean to you? For the situation I give you, how would you maximize your connection to the customer?

When you apply for a job that is a good fit for you, you can approach your interview with confidence – you will be able to answer and handle the questions well. If you apply for jobs that are not a good fit for you, it will be obvious in your responses. So, do better work up front to apply for the right jobs, then relax and show the hiring manager how confident and competent you are in your great responses.

Click here for more information about talent-based interviews.

I was meeting a colleague for coffee. While waiting at the coffee shop, I watched as person after person entered without holding the door for another person or greeting anyone.

At the checkout counter in a food store, I watched as a woman with two items and obviously pressed for time, asked to step ahead of a woman with a full cart. The woman with the full cart said “no” and reminder her it was important to wait her turn.

Watching these I was reminded of something I read recently in Krista Tippett’s new book, Einstein’s God. It was a quote from Philo “Be kind because everyone you meet is carrying a great burden.” Life is tough. All of us have difficult things going on and at times we can all be pretty fragile.

But notice our response when we hear a kind word, a respectful gesture or just a little bit of care. We respond in kind. We share the emotion. We feel better.

Check in on your words and actions. How kind are they? Try these to build back some kindness in your day:
1. Commit to random acts of kindness. Smile, hold a door open, buy the person behind you in line a coffee, send a card, make a call.
2. Listen to your self-talk. Redirect it to positive and supportive, instead of negative and critical. When you are kinder to yourself, you’ll be kinder to others.
3. Plan your time better to eliminate the need to rush. A less hurried day has time for kindness.

The power of kindness is extraordinary. In a world that seems to dwell on challenges and unhappiness, redirect your energy into being kind to yourself and to others. As Gandhi said, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” And it starts with kindness.

I have put together the ten rules for a great interview. Click here to see each in greater detail. And while on the site, check out the other great ideas to get hired in 2010.

My ten rules for a great interview:
1. Think “fit” – how you fit and how the company fits for you.
2. Impressions matter.
3. Be positive, upbeat, optimistic and congenial.
4. Have three great questions ready to ask.
5. Focus on your value.
6. Be confident, not arrogant.
7. Make sure you know all the facts.
8. Look for common ground.
9. Remember the power of body language.
10. Have fun.

Your interview is your time to connect with them, impress them, show your fit and indicate how you will add value to the organization. Follow these rules and the interview will be a success. The job offer generally comes down to how you do in the interview. Know yourself. Be confident. Be great.

Share these interview rules with those others looking for jobs.

Some celebrities seem never to fall. Their careers keep rising, they have money, fame, great lives and great success. And then there are the other 350 million of us who deal regularly with disappointment, challenge and failure.

Failure – it is part of living a great life. In fact our failures are a means to better understand ourselves – to learn how capable we are. Think of it this way:

When we fail, we meet an obstacle we are unable to navigate around. This obstacle is a roadblock requiring us stop, think, observe, assess and learn. For the times we did not fall or encounter an obstacle, we were successful in our response – nothing new to learn. But obstacles require more thinking, more effort and more lessons. These lessons set us up for future successes.

So as you move through life, your greatest lessons will be in your failures. But you won’t succeed if you don’t get up from every fall.

So here is my “pick myself back up” approach – see if it works for you:
1. I go to my library of wise quotes and highlighted passages in books from wise authors; their comments and wisdom help me regain my footing and sanity.
2. I look at how I failed; I record 3 things that did not go right (what do I need to learn?).
3. I record three ways things could improve – and what I need to do to make them improve (what talents and strengths do I have I didn’t know about – or what resources and help from others can I count on?)
4. I record two things I am great at (because a bruised ego needs some good news).
5. I make a commitment to improve and give myself a high-five for being tough in a tough world – and then get a Starbucks.

Develop your response to getting back up stronger and more determined. Realize only you can do this for you. You own your life and all of or your responses. Learn to see a fall as a lesson to make your future days more successful.

Your EQ – your emotional intelligence (your ability to know yourself, manage yourself and get along with others) accounts for 40 – 60% of your career success. Very important.

Today’s workplace is a service-based (relationship) workplace. Since employees are paid to think through their responses to customers, and they control their minds, managers must now engage and inspire employees to activate their performance. Today’s managers must be able to listen, hear, watch and connect – they must be relationship builders, connectors and communicators.

To be a relationship builder requires strong EQ – a clear knowledge of yourself and how to successfully relate to others. This enables a manager to better connect with and understand employees – to know their talents, values and interests to put them in the right jobs, motivate them and activate their performance.

To improve your EQ:
1. Become more aware or your responses, reactions and emotions. Noticing how you react helps you assess its effectiveness and ineffectiveness.
2. Manage your emotions to improve your ability to listen, respond and successfully react with others.
3. Watch the behaviors of others; understand their moods and communication method to improve how you connect with them. Learn to listen so people will talk, and talk so people will listen.

Smarts – defined today – relate more to your ability to know yourself and to connect successfully with others rather than just what you know. Though some people are naturally better at “connection” and EQ, studies support all of us can improve. Improving your EQ has a direct impact on the quality of your work and life relationships, the quality of your work and the quality of your life.

One of my favorite books is Arianne de Bonvoisin’s First 30 Days. In it, she outlines nine principles of handling change and building a more positive perspective. Her first principle is “People who successfully navigate change have positive beliefs.”

Positive beliefs come from you – you may not be able to control the things that happen to you but you can control how you respond to them. You can choose to see “half-full” – upbeat, optimistic and confident – or choose to see “half-empty” – down, pessimistic and unsure.

Consider these ways to build a more positive perspective:
1. Notice when you become negative and immediately focus on something positive. Have others help you see your behavior.
2. Read a power quote or an inspirational passage to start your day on a positive tone.
3. Create an upbeat “break” during the day. Focus on 3 things that have gone well so far.
4. Choose your friends wisely; associate with positive and confident people.

To make the point, here are some great half-empty/half-full perspectives from the website www.businessballs.com.
o The project manager/engineer says the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. 

o The bar fly says is not about whether the glass is half full or half empty, it’s about who is paying for the next round.
o The consultant says let’s examine the question, prepare a strategy for an answer, and all for a daily rate of…
o The worrier frets that the remaining half will evaporate by tomorrow.
o The fanatic thinks the glass is completely full, even though it isn’t. 

o The entrepreneur sees the glass as undervalued by half its potential.
o The computer specialist says that next year the glass capacity will double and will cost half the price.
o The Buddhist says don’t worry, remember the glass is already broken.
o The personal coach knows that the glass goes from full to empty depending on the circumstances, and reminds the drinker that he can always fill the glass when he wishes.
o The grammarian says that while the terms half-full and half-empty are colloquially acceptable the glass can technically be neither since both full and empty are absolute states and therefore are incapable of being halved or modified in any way. 


You control your attitude. Know yourself; choose to be positive and upbeat. It is great for your health and happiness.

In 2004 Dr. Robert Sapolsky published a book titled, Why Zebra’s Don’t Get Ulcers. In it, he presents that animals and humans are equipped to handle both calm and danger. The parasympathetic system runs all of the routine internal body systems, day in and day out (periods of calm). The sympathetic system is designed to help us survive in a period of danger, stress or euphoria, and interrupts the parasympathetic system.

I am not a scientist, so here is my simple summary of his findings. When we are calm (we are not affected by the nuisance events), our internal maintenance systems respond – we stay healthy.

But when we get upset (the brain senses danger – big or small), it activates a fight or flight response. The body calls all its resources to be ready for something big, shutting down its focus on the daily support functions. We are now ready for a fight or a flight.

Here is the point. The body is designed to handle a temporary fight or flight response. Animals know this. And according to Sapolsky, when the lion gets his prey, or the zebra gets away, the fight or flight response ends and the body resumes its normal response. But humans are different. When we experience recurring nuisance events, we move our systems into a state of perpetual stress; we constantly signal to our bodies to be ready to fight or hit the road. And when this happens, the regular, healthy and maintenance functions of the body are interrupted. The result – a challenged immune system resulting in ulcers, cancer, diabetes and other illnesses.

How we perceive events activates emotions; emotions activate neurological and biological responses in our body. We must train ourselves to manage our emotional responses to all types of events – to know what is danger and what is only a nuisance- to stay healthy and sane.

So consider this:
1. Is this a nuisance and you should laugh it off? (Laughing is great for our health).
2. Is this truly serious and worth the attention?

Life throws out small tests to get us ready for larger ones. Manage your responses and use fight or flight only when it is needed – the body was designed that way. Learn from the zebras – they don’t get ulcers. They don’t let the little stuff get them down. That way, when they need to run, they are really ready – and they survive. And at every other point, they are loving life.

Here is how it works: identify what you are good at and passionate about doing AND the hot industries or jobs that need your talents and passions. These are the jobs to apply for.

Let’s see an example:
Your talents: You are detailed-oriented, love being in charge and are focused on great results (these are your talents). Your passions include persuading others, organizing, leading things and making a difference.

Hot industries: Healthcare

Job possibilities:
o Medical office manager
o Security in medical facility/hospital
o Facilities employee/facilities manager/Spa management

o Hospital/health facility management

o Medical records management

o Personal trainer

Hot industry: Accounting/Regulation/Finance

Job possibilities:
o Accountant, financial analyst, tax specialist
o Compliance auditor, government auditor
o Researcher for investment company, demographer or trend analyst \
o Forensic accountant
o Actuary

Hot industry: Technology

Job possibilities:
o Geek squad
o PC application specialist

o Artificial intelligence engineer
o CAD technician
o Repair technician
o Network engineer

These are just ideas – see the process in action. Know you. Know your world. Find your fit. Use my list of Hot Jobs to help you consider what roles allow you to play to your strengths.

Go to www.LiveFiredUp.com for more tools – click on the For JobSeeker link.

What struck me more is the concept of a holi “day.” If these are really important events, why do we limit the celebration to just a day? Shouldn’t they be recurring events or recurring celebrations?

Here’s my thought. Holi “days” aren’t cutting it. The daily celebrations are too infrequent and don’t encourage enough of the right behaviors to last all year. In a world that is increasingly unkind, selfish and confrontational, couldn’t we make an improvement if we were to extend the celebrations? Couldn’t we stay more focused on being kind, considerate, passionate, loving and respectful?

So I decided to create a “never miss an opportunity” list – a list of things I should celebrate or do on a regular basis – not just once. Here’s the start of my list. What would you add?

Never miss an opportunity to…:
o Tell (and show) the people you love how much you love them and what they mean to you.
o Share a story about your life’s success and failures to teach someone else.
o Make someone else feel important, even if you did most of the work.
o Show your patriotism and respect for your country.
o Show your tolerance for someone who does not look like you or believe in what you do.
o Stop and appreciate a flower, a tree, the wind, a star, rock formation or any other part of nature.
o Know yourself, your talents and passions, so you can build a life that makes you happy and helps you feel content.
o Say thank you, hold a door open, let another person or car pass ahead of you, or to be kind to someone you don’t know.
o Give away some of your “extras” to someone who has no “extras.”
o Learn something new to expand what you know and your contribution to the world.
o Make the first call even when it is the other person’s obligation or turn.
o Share a call, thought, card or gift with someone you love or who needs to hear from you – just because.
o Say you are sorry when you hurt someone – even if you didn’t mean to.
o Allow another to have an opinion different than yours, and still respect them.
o Spend more time with your pet.
o Sing, dance, laugh, tell a joke, cry or be more human, even when others you don’t know are watching. Invite them to join it.
o Smile at someone you don’t know.
o Bound out of bed, excited you have another day.

How will you never miss an opportunity to connect the very special people in your world? And what can you bring to the world that will make it better for all of us? Never miss your opportunity to celebrate and to make a difference.

It is not the same world that was in place when many of you got your last jobs. The nature of work changes quickly – some industries die, others grow almost overnight. So what is hot and what is not with jobs. And what hot jobs need your talents and passions.

So here is how to proceed:
1. Connect to information that keeps you current about the hot jobs. Google “hot jobs” and see links. Connect to www.Smartmoney.com, www.monster.com, www.hotjobs.yahoo.com, and www.careerplanner.com.

2. Identify the industries that interest you AND are growing industries (why select a job in a dying industry?).
a. Growing industries:
i. Healthcare (including mental health, wellness and fitness)
ii. Technology (including web, design, engineering, programming)
iii. Accounting/Regulation/Finance
iv. Retail/Customer Service
v. Transportation/Travel
vi. Education/Teaching/Instruction
vii. Entertainment
viii. Law enforcement/Law/Government
ix. Science, Pharmacology, Medical research
x. Trades/Life Services (including construction, plumbing, electrical, landscaping, hair styling, bakers, mechanics, etc).

b. Companies who are hiring:
i. Click here for the link to see Hot Jobs’ top 100 companies who are hiring.

3. What jobs are Hot Hot Hot!
i. Click to my “Hot Job” list by industry.

Staying connected is critical for you to be aware of the opportunities and to know how to start the process of finding the right job for you. Always know what jobs are growing and which are fading. Position yourself in a high growth industry.


Next week – we focus on a finding a job that fits you. These are jobs that match your talents and passions and give you a competitive advantage in the hiring process.

See the great “get hired” tools at www.LiveFiredUp.com – click on “Job Seeker.”
Pass this on to your friends who are job hunting.

Jill Bolte Taylor, the author of the amazing book My Stroke of Insight; A Brain Scientist’s Personal Journey, explains our left brain is our controlling, judgmental and critical brain; our open, accepting and optimistic brain is our right brain. In our performance-focused world, most of us favor our analytical left brain. We listen more to our “critic” that more readily finds fault and complains, than applauds and supports.

She shares that the right brain imposes fewer restrictions, judges less, sees things as they are, appreciates the richness of the moment, is open, creative and sensitive to nonverbal communication. This is the inner peace standard equipment we all receive – but we frequently can’t hear it over the louder, more controlling left brain.

So to manage the left brain judgmental rhetoric, she puts her “critic” on a time schedule. She allows it to whine rampantly for 30 minutes – then it is over. She even gives it a daily time slot. That is the only time any whining is allowed. And if the time slot is missed for some reason, she does not allow the whine time until the next scheduled session – the next day. What a great idea.

Each of us has things we need to complain about; it is part of our process to successfully deal with things. The problem develops when we allow too much our self- and social-talk to be negative and unhealthy – when our left brain critic takes over.

Focus on directing your self-talk into more a more supportive, caring and optimistic (right brain) dialog. Treat yourself lovingly and with kindness. Watch the caustic left brain “critic” that can sometimes keep us in line, but mostly sees us as underachieving and underperforming.

Learn from Dr. Bolte Taylor and build some whine time into your day. Impose a time limit – and when it’s over, it’s over – until tomorrow. Start with 30 minutes if you have a very loud critic. Set the timer. Soon, you will see you only need just a moment or two to vent, realign and move on. Silence your critic (left brain). Activate your admirer and dreamer (right brain). The conversation is so much better.

Most people continue to apply for the wrong jobs because they don’t know what they are good at. And today, to have the best performance, you must work in job that needs what you are great at and are passionate about. Without these, you don’t feel capable, competent or excited in your work – and it shows.

So here is how to proceed:
1. Write down what you think you are naturally good at – your talents – this will be things like connecting with others, focusing on details, committed to big performance, great at listening and relating to others, creating order out of chaos…etc. Don’t be humble. List everything you are good at; things that come naturally to you. This is difficult for many people so try these other two options:

2. Next, write down what you are passionate about. What do you love to do – what gets you out of bed in the morning and what you could do all day? It may be teaching, helping others, running a business, writing, painting, cooking, selling…whatever you love to do. List as many as come to mind. You will find that you generally do not need help with this – each of us is far more aware of our passions than our talents.

Now: look for the intersection of your two lists – what are you good at AND passionate about doing. This is the starting point for finding a job that fits you. This is key to finding a job AND loving your job.

You may be great at connecting with people and passionate about sharing stories. A job in sales, customer service or retail in any industry may be a good fit. You may be great at focusing on details and precision and are passionate making a difference. You may find that careers in the medical field, IT, law or similar fields will play to your talents and passions.

Know yourself – because your next step is to learn what the hot jobs are – so you can determine which jobs are a good fit for you and which needs what you are great at. This will give you a competitive advantage in getting hired.

Click here for the full “Get Hired” Plan. See all the “Get Hired” resources at www.LiveFIredUp.com, click on “Job Seeker.”

The amazing thing is that we are so quick to customize our food, but so reluctant to customize our lives.

Each of us is born with a unique set of neural pathways (brain responses) that create our natural abilities and our passions. Some are artistic and social. Others are empirical, detail-focused and analytical. Some can sing and others can solve puzzles. But most let others direct them to what they should do for work and how they should live their lives.

Your happiest moments happen when you use what you are good at and passionate about. The more of these moments you create, the better your work and life become – you feel more capable, competent and more fired up. And only you have the key to determine the “true you.”

So commit a little time each day to write your “owner’s manual”:
1. List what you are good at; what are your talents and strengths?
2. List what you are passionate about; what do you love to do?

Once known, how will you customize your work and life around your talents, strengths and passions? If you could have life “your way,” what would you choose?

For more information including my Talent and Thinking Style Assessment and my “For Life” section, see www.LiveFiredUp.com.

For many people, when things get tough, they shut down. They run out of gas, feel stuck and sit waiting for rescue.

As today’s quote so clearly says, you can’t side idle – you must get up, take ownership and get on with things. You are responsible for your rescue.

But here is what you need to know: You are infinitely more capable than you first believe. You have significant talents and strengths; you have wisdom and power – you need to access it.

Ariane de Bonvoisin explains in her book First 30 Days that when you encounter an obstacle, you are forced to stop – and now think. An obstacle is nothing more than an opportunity to look into yourself with new clarity to see your greater capabilities. Obstacles – tough times – actually can show us how much more capable we are.

So how do you keep driving when you feel like you are out of gas?

1. Find some quiet time and listen inward – get introduced (or re-introduced) to the more significant you.

5. Choose to act by creating a plan – start small; but start.

No one said life would be easy – but it is always good. Obstacles force us to better know ourselves and to see what we are really made of. So when you feel like you are out of gas, build a plan to get yourself back on the road of life. It is both an adventure and a great ride.

See the life power tools on www.LifeFiredUp.com and be sure to click on the Hunt for Opportunities.

Some people go through their life rigid and inflexible – like metal. They have the same form, the same shape, the same thinking regardless of the world changing around them. They refuse to understand, be resilient or flexible. They are black or white. They are metal.

Others realize that flexibility is the key to a powerful and wonderful life. In our quickly changing world, happy and content people are resilient and flexible – like plastic. They bend, accommodate and welcome change. They realize change brings a greater view of the world and helps us realize a successful and peaceful world is built on the respect for differences.

Many times there is wisdom in age – sometimes we just have to be on the planet long enough to learn some of life’s greatest lessons. The greatest may be that none of us is as smart as all of us. We need the input and wisdom of others to figure things out. We need varied perspectives and must remain flexible and open to hear important information. Flexibility. It does a body good. It does a mind good. It does a heart good.

Take Action. How can you be more open, resilient and content with a changing world? How can you be more plastic and less metal? How can this help you work strong and live stronger?

For more information click on “For Individuals” on www.LiveFiredUp.com.

NY Times columnist and author Tom Friedman calls them the “untouchables” – those employees who add so much value to a company that they are untouchable when it comes to layoffs. Is this you?

To be noticed, appreciated and retained, employees must take full personal responsibility for creating significant, unique and results-oriented value for the organization.

To improve your impact and to add value to the workplace, develop each of these four areas:

1. Know your organization. Be familiar with your organization’s purpose, mission and value statements. This shows your effort to understand the business and to use this information to regularly make decisions that positively affect the organization’s performance.
2. Know your strengths. Each of us is good at some things and not at others. To stand out in the workplace, you must be able to know what you are intrinsically good at – what your talents and strengths are – and then work in roles that allow you to fully develop and exploit these talents. Play to your strengths.
3. Take initiative. Step up and take responsibility to help solve the organization’s problems and maximize its opportunities. Be visible; be vocal.
4. Focus on the bottom line. Know the impact of your ideas and propose things that make a difference. Track your contributions. Think numbers; think metrics and financial performance.

We are in a new period of employee accountability; you own your ability to get noticed in the workplace. Stand out in the workplace; play to your strengths, find the opportunities and drive the bottom line. This is how to become “untouchable.”

For more information click on “For Employees/Job Seekers” and the “Hunt for Opportunities” on www.LiveFiredUp.com. See my Power Performance blog on www.Bizmore.com for more practical performance information.