Posts Tagged ‘attitude’

Handle Things A Little At A Time

Thursday, July 8th, 2010

I was having a conversation with a friend of mine I know from the gym. She said, “I hate my life.” Whoa. Stop. “Maybe there are some things you dislike about life at the moment, but do you really hate your life?” I asked. She laughed and said ‘no,’ but that she was in a funk.

Life is as life is. The most successful people in life (and I define successful people in life as those who love their lives, not just those that have the most stuff) are those who find small ways to stay upbeat, happy and engaged regardless what comes their way. They reconnect to small meaningful things during the day to remind themselves of what is going right instead of what is going wrong. They make the time for attitude mini-makeovers – minor changes in attitude and approach to focus on abundance and possibility, not scarcity and impossibility.

Here are two examples:

1. When you notice your belt is getting a little tighter than it should, eliminate snacks for the week, or replace them with fruit. Don’t change all your eating habits, just select one thing and either eliminate an abuse or add something of value. It helps you feel in charge, it is easier to do and it helps you address an issue. You feel empowered and capable. It does great things for your attitude.

2. When you see that times are tight and you have less money for the old traditions of eating out, going to movies or buying things at will, you modify just a bit to have friends over, play board games, go for coffee instead of meals, or plan a day of window shopping instead of store shopping. Life is still fun, but now it doesn’t put you into a financial situation you can’t afford. You feel empowered and capable. It does great things for your attitude.

Human nature seems to drive us to notice what is not right, then spend our time complaining about it and making it larger than it is. True, life does send us true traumas. So, to me, when it is not a true trauma, don’t make it one. See things as they are, realizing that life is as it is; our job is to find ways to be happy and successful with whatever comes our way. And to quote from Winnie the Pooh (it is amazing where wisdom can come from), “You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” Just handle things a little at a time.

Half-full or Half-Empty?

Thursday, March 4th, 2010

Are you a half-full or a half-empty kind of person? Are you optimistic or are you sure to find the down side if there is one to be had?

One of my favorite books is Arianne de Bonvoisin’s First 30 Days. In it, she outlines nine principles of handling change and building a more positive perspective. Her first principle is “People who successfully navigate change have positive beliefs.”

Positive beliefs come from you – you may not be able to control the things that happen to you but you can control how you respond to them. You can choose to see “half-full” – upbeat, optimistic and confident – or choose to see “half-empty” – down, pessimistic and unsure.

Consider these ways to build a more positive perspective:
1. Notice when you become negative and immediately focus on something positive. Have others help you see your behavior.
2. Read a power quote or an inspirational passage to start your day on a positive tone.
3. Create an upbeat “break” during the day. Focus on 3 things that have gone well so far.
4. Choose your friends wisely; associate with positive and confident people.

To make the point, here are some great half-empty/half-full perspectives from the website www.businessballs.com.
o The project manager/engineer says the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. 

o The bar fly says is not about whether the glass is half full or half empty, it’s about who is paying for the next round.
o The consultant says let’s examine the question, prepare a strategy for an answer, and all for a daily rate of…
o The worrier frets that the remaining half will evaporate by tomorrow.
o The fanatic thinks the glass is completely full, even though it isn’t. 

o The entrepreneur sees the glass as undervalued by half its potential.
o The computer specialist says that next year the glass capacity will double and will cost half the price.
o The Buddhist says don’t worry, remember the glass is already broken.
o The personal coach knows that the glass goes from full to empty depending on the circumstances, and reminds the drinker that he can always fill the glass when he wishes.
o The grammarian says that while the terms half-full and half-empty are colloquially acceptable the glass can technically be neither since both full and empty are absolute states and therefore are incapable of being halved or modified in any way. 


You control your attitude. Know yourself; choose to be positive and upbeat. It is great for your health and happiness.