Posts Tagged ‘love life’

Ten Things To Do To Be Healthy And Happy

Thursday, September 2nd, 2010

I read Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert several years ago after hearing her on a radio interview. I loved the premise in her book – about finding your true self and the hard work it takes – and her eloquent explanation. That told me that the book would be both important to read and, for someone who loves language, an enjoyable book to read. I found it to be both.

This is not a book review. Rather, a reminder that wisdom is all around us and that when we tune in, we learn things about ourselves, our lives and our world. The renewed interest in Eat, Pray, Love because of the movie has brought Elizabeth Gilbert and her thinking back into view. I recently saw her list of ten things to be happy and healthy; her perspective is that when these are taken care of, everything else seems to take care of itself.

First, I really like her list. Second, I like that she created a list. So even if some of these things do not encourage you to live healthy and happy, fill in with the things that do. This is a reminder that we invent our lives in the way we want them – we own how we approach our day to make the most of our lives. Develop your list of the ten things to be healthy and happy, and to love your life. (The comments in parentheses are mine – because I always have an opinion about everything.)

Here are her ten things:
1. Talk a walk (invite a friend to enhance the experience).
2. Write something (journal what you think and feel each day, you’ll be amazed what you learn about yourself).
3. Read something (there is too much to know not to stay connected to other people’s ideas).
4. Don’t eat too much (I think she learned this after her time in Italy).
5. Spend some time in silence (I like to spend this time outdoors).
6. Stretch (I like to think this is both body and mind – both atrophy without movement).
7. Send a message of love to someone (great idea – and why not send it to several people?).
8. Drink water (I like coffee better but she has a point).
9. Mess around in the garden (touch nature and be connected to the planet).
10. Floss (stay healthy and show up ready to face the world each day).

The number of things doesn’t matter. Develop your list so life is great. I didn’t present them because she has become a celebrity. I presented them because they are wise. I hope they inspire you to play to your greatness and have a life that is healthy and happy.

Please forward this to someone who can benefit from it and watch for my new book, The Greatness Zone – Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, Transform the World due out October 1. Sign up at www.TheGreatnessZone.com for more information about the book and learning how to find and live in your personal greatness zone.

If You Blend, You Lose

Thursday, August 26th, 2010

In today’s workplace, if your service or product looks like everyone else’s, then no one remembers you – you just blend. And if you blend in today’s competitive economy, you lose.

There is a life lesson in this same phrase, “if you blend, you lose.” Your greatest happiness, impact and success will be in living your true life, not in following the crowd.

We are truly unique – different from everyone. This distinction is both external and internal. We look different, we think differently. Our brain biology predisposes us to be good at some things and not others. We love some things and not others. Our greatness is in the unique combination of talents, passions and strengths that came hardwired in our DNA when we were born. We were born to be unique – not to blend.

To take advantage of this greatness, we must take the time to know ourselves – to learn about what we are good at, passionate about and what matters to us.

Most of us have a loud “committee” – those internal voices that tell us to play it safe, blend, don’t stand out, do what everybody else does, be concerned with what others think and say. Then, we conform. We listen to voices that steer us away from our abilities, our dreams and our best contributions. When we don’t know ourselves well, we trust the perspectives of others more than our own – others’ voices become louder than ours. We follow the herd.

When we blend – when we act like everyone else even though we are different – we really do lose. We lose when we don’t play to our greatness – when we don’t develop our talents and strengths, and live our passions. We lose when we miss out on the things that move us, inspire us and engage us. And when we say no to these, we give away our greatest gift – the ability to invent our lives as we want them.

So, to develop the courage to stand out and be who you are,
1. Identify your talents.
2. Next, identify your passions.
3. Then, review your life to see how much of your talents and passions you include in the way you live and work.
4. Change things to live what matters to you. Turn down the volume of others’ voices.

My personal perspective is that when we realize our personal greatness, we bring our best to our world – we transform our world. So, if we blend we don’t live authentically, then we cheat the world. When we blend, we all lose.

As has been said, “We don’t get harmony when we all sing the same note.” We are supposed to find our own voice and sing our part. Discover your part and sing it in your way. What a concert it will be.

This perspective is presented in my new book, The Greatness Zone – Know Yourself, Find Your Fit, Transform the World. Join our mailing list at www.TheGreatnessZone.com to be notified when the book is available, and please pass this on to someone who can benefit from it.

Handle Things A Little At A Time

Thursday, July 8th, 2010

I was having a conversation with a friend of mine I know from the gym. She said, “I hate my life.” Whoa. Stop. “Maybe there are some things you dislike about life at the moment, but do you really hate your life?” I asked. She laughed and said ‘no,’ but that she was in a funk.

Life is as life is. The most successful people in life (and I define successful people in life as those who love their lives, not just those that have the most stuff) are those who find small ways to stay upbeat, happy and engaged regardless what comes their way. They reconnect to small meaningful things during the day to remind themselves of what is going right instead of what is going wrong. They make the time for attitude mini-makeovers – minor changes in attitude and approach to focus on abundance and possibility, not scarcity and impossibility.

Here are two examples:

1. When you notice your belt is getting a little tighter than it should, eliminate snacks for the week, or replace them with fruit. Don’t change all your eating habits, just select one thing and either eliminate an abuse or add something of value. It helps you feel in charge, it is easier to do and it helps you address an issue. You feel empowered and capable. It does great things for your attitude.

2. When you see that times are tight and you have less money for the old traditions of eating out, going to movies or buying things at will, you modify just a bit to have friends over, play board games, go for coffee instead of meals, or plan a day of window shopping instead of store shopping. Life is still fun, but now it doesn’t put you into a financial situation you can’t afford. You feel empowered and capable. It does great things for your attitude.

Human nature seems to drive us to notice what is not right, then spend our time complaining about it and making it larger than it is. True, life does send us true traumas. So, to me, when it is not a true trauma, don’t make it one. See things as they are, realizing that life is as it is; our job is to find ways to be happy and successful with whatever comes our way. And to quote from Winnie the Pooh (it is amazing where wisdom can come from), “You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” Just handle things a little at a time.

What You Can and Can’t Control

Thursday, April 8th, 2010

Here is a situation: It rains during your meticulously planned annual big family barbecue.

Feeling the tension and anger? I thought so.

Two questions:
The first: What can’t you control?
o The weather.
o Your favorite cousins have the flu and won’t be attending.
o Using the new fire pit under the flowering pear tree that is in full flower.
o Aunt Melinda’s jello salad; Uncle Jim’s jokes.

The second: What can you control?
o How you cook the food today.
o How you rearrange the house or garage to have the party.
o How you move the activities to indoor events.
o How much fun you will still have, and how great it will be to see the family.
o Your outlook and attitude.

One of my favorite quotes comes from the poet Maya Angelou, “I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage and tangled Christmas tree lights.”

So, if this were your party, what would the rain tell you about you? Do events that you cannot control take control of you? Do you have a meltdown, or do you realize it is beyond your control and find reasons to be happy?

I often tell the story of getting detoured from my normal route to the highway only to find an amazing plant nursery I did not know about; great plants, great prices and a farmer’s market. What a find! I had two choices with the detour – allow it to get me upset, or to realize I had no control over the event and to be on the lookout for something great.

I believe there is always something great, often initially hidden by a disappointment. The trick is to learn how to be able to see it. And you can’t if you let the things you cannot control get you down.

You can’t always control how things happen, but you can always control how you respond. Be optimistic, upbeat and look for the good. “Positive attitude” – it does a body good.

Please pass this on to someone who can benefit from it.